Anger Management
Anger Triggers and Cues Self-awareness allows use to recognize when we’re angry. Most people have certain things that are likely to trigger our anger (e.g., not feeling listened to, observing or experiencing injustice). Knowing the things that commonly trigger our anger allows us to be prepared to manage our anger when we experience that situation or even when we anticipate such situations. We can use our regulation tools before our anger gets the best of us. Also, many people have similar experiences each time we’re angry, so those responses can be warning signs we look for. We can identify the thoughts (e.g., I hate this, this can’t be happening) physical sensations (e.g., muscle tension, racing heart), and behavioral urges (e.g., yelling, throwing things) we often experience when angry. These are the alarm bells that let us know we need to use regulation tools to manage our anger. I Feel, I Want When we experience any emotion, it is helpful to identify the feeling with a statement such as “I am feeling ….” That statement identifies the emotion while reminding us that we are not our emotions. They are temporary experiences. All emotions pass in time. Also, they are very real, but they are reactions we have, not who we are or an external reality. Recognizing this helps us to get a little distance so that we can choose how we respond to the emotion of anger. We can choose to feel the emotion of anger and use regulation tools to act in a way that we feel good about ourselves and how we managed the situation. Anger lets us know that there is something we need to do something about. Usually, we are concerned that we will not get something we want, will lose something we like, or will get something we don’t want. Identifying what we want or what we want to avoid also helps us get the distance we need to respond in a helpful way to our anger. Knowing, and sometimes expressing, what we want helps us move closer to that goal rather than getting stuck in the uncomfortable emotion of anger. Acceptance Sometimes what we want is not possible, so the option that will cause us the least pain and be the most helpful is acceptance. Acceptance means we acknowledge reality. It does not require us to like or even be okay with that reality. When we accept things that are out of our control, we are free to take action that can effectively help us move closer to our goals and desires. Sometimes we can’t get what we want, but we can feel good about sticking to our values in a tricky situation. This can reduce the anger we feel and improve our lives. Values-Based Action Once we know what we want and let go of things that are not possible, we can explore actions that will move us closer to our goals. These should be actions we can take, not changing situations or the behavior of others (those are out of our control). Once we identify those actions, we can break them down into simple steps that we can take in the moment. When we take those actions, we might feel our anger decrease, if it hasn’t begun to do so already. This is the power of using anger for its intended purpose. Sometimes we are not able to think clearly about actions that are consistent with our values, goals, and desires because our anger makes it hard to think. This is a neurological reaction to anger, but there are things we can do to help our brain get back on track. Splashing cold water on our face or putting an ice pack on our checks (on either side of our nose) can help calm the body so we can think clearly. Taking deep breaths and exhaling slowly, so that our exhale is twice as long as our inhale also can calm the body and let us use our brains to think about taking actions consistent with our values. Other times, safe physical activity can help discharge the tension that anger causes. We may have to repeat these strategies several times before the tension from our anger resolves. When to Seek Help Sometimes our anger causes us to hurt people or suffer ourselves. If after trying these strategies you still struggle with anger management, please talk with a mental health provider. Mental health providers can help you to apply these steps to manage anger as well as identify issues underlying anger to help you handle your anger and live your best life. Click here to schedule an appointment at CARE for support with anger management. If you are concerned about the way a loved one’s anger is affecting you, please see these tips to advocate for yourself. If you feel unsafe in in a relationship or have concern about someone who might be experiencing violence in a relationship, please see our domestic violence resources. These also are concerns that can be discussed with a mental health provider. Written By : Sarah Sifers, Ph.D., LP We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/anger-management/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/anger-management
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If you do not have a primary care doctor, please consider making this a priority to establish care. Also, if you have considered seeing a therapist but have not yet taken the step, please prioritize yourself. I really encourage young adults to find a long-term provider/ clinic so that medical records are accessible for a more accurate medical history. Established care and an ongoing relationship with your doctor are also very helpful when coordinating care with other healthcare providers such as therapists and psychiatrists. One very important aspect of health care appointments is screening. It is a good idea to learn more about preventive-care-benefits available through care providers who are in-network with your health plan and ask about benefits that may be covered at 100% as part of your plan.
Individuals with certain risk factors such as obesity, tobacco use, alcohol misuse, high cholesterol, and diabetes are at higher risk of additional medical and medical health complications; therefore, it is important to have regular wellness visits and screen for medical, mental health, and substance use. While some people view mental health and physical health as separate, they are closely interconnected! Did you know that CARE Counseling provides mental health screening as part of the intake process? Our therapists will screen for common mental health symptoms such as depression and anxiety. Your therapist will ask about any medical conditions, current medications, substance use, and history of presenting concerns. The best practice is to coordinate care with your primary care physician. This helps ensure that your medical providers are first ruling out any medical causes of your health condition. Mental health treatment is generally recommended if there are no known medical causes. Mental health treatment may include therapy, medication management, or both. One awesome benefit that CARE Counseling recently has added to the available services for adults receiving counseling is medication-management. This is a client-centered service for adults (18+) who are experiencing difficulties managing symptoms such as the following-- Anxiety & Panic Attention-Deficit Disorder (ADD) Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Peripartum-postpartum-depression CARE’s medication management services complement preventative care well and can provide relief in symptoms while one is participating in therapy to process sources of stress and learn strategies to cope with symptoms. Taking a proactive approach to talking with your doctor, seeing a therapist, and if applicable, medication management can help reduce the likelihood of symptoms worsening. It can also help prevent seeking out services when things are in a state of crisis. Routine screening is the way to go! Let us join you this year in taking good care of your health. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/the-importance-of-primary-care/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/the-importance-of-primary-care Suicide Awareness and Remembering Stephen tWitch BossAs the world is learning about the death of Stephen-“tWitch” Boss, there are so many things about lives ending too short that don’t make sense. Our hearts are heavy. How can someone who appears happy–surrounded by family, friends, the community… even fame and fortune die by suicide? Friends and family in my circle of influence could not answer this question in response to the sudden and unexpected suicides that have left a ripple-effect over the last few years. Did you know that for every 1 suicide, 115 people are directly impacted? The death of Boss has left a big ripple. Grief and loss are impacting so many individuals who are seeking therapy right now. Loved ones are dying and we have so many people struggling with their mental health. Social media can be an escape from some of the heaviness to help us smile, relax, and even laugh. It can be incredibly difficult to see a celebrity, one who has entertained, inspired, and captivated hearts die in such as tragic and unexpected way. Moments of time captured via video or photos such as dancing and celebrating milestones with loved ones can represent fleeting emotions. We may never know what emotions or thoughts Boss was experiencing leading up to his death. It is frightening to realize that some people who contemplate suicide may not show any visible signs leading up to the attempt. One way in which we-can-all-prevent-suicide is to know the risk factors and warning signs. While the warning signs may be more obvious to detect, such as talking about feeling trapped, being in unbearable pain, experiencing hopelessness, or feeling like there is no reason to live, the risk factors can be more subtle. The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline’s website list the following risk factors to look out for in your loved ones.
Did the last item surprise you at all? Exposure to Boss’ story via the media and the Internet is one of many risk factors that increase the likelihood that one may contemplate or attempt suicide. Although suicide is uncomfortable to talk about, we need to be the 1 to check in with loved ones who are struggling and ask “Are you thinking about suicide?” Being there while asking some basic questions to assess if they are at imminent risk, and then taking steps to get help by connecting with a trained professional is so important! At CARE Counseling, our trained therapists can help assess the risk factors for suicide, create a plan, and provide additional resources. If you have any concerns about your own or a loved one’s mental health, talking to your doctor, psychiatrist, or therapist are great places to start. The hospital and emergency departments are available for individuals with imminent safety risks. If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available through local crisis and chat lines in addition to other suicide-prevention-resources. 24/7 Crisis Hotline: 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline Crisis Text Line Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC This TikTok was posted less than 48hrs before his passing. from https://care-clinics.com/suicide-awareness-and-remembering-stephen-twitch-boss/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/suicide-awareness-and-remembering-stephen-twitch-boss Different Types of Grief and Loss Models
Whatever you are experiencing at this time of seeking-help, your thoughts and feelings are an expression of where you are currently at. There are many different types-of-grief and loss. Some may have already occurred such as an event that has resulted in the loss of someone or something. Examples include the death of a person or pet and loss of body functions. Some losses are connected to the self, such as loss of identity or mobility. There can be a loss of security due to losing things such as a relationship, housing, or finances. Even events that others may see as exciting and happy such as marriage, career changes, retirement, and moving represent elements of loss. Some losses may represent what “might have been” and others may be “in process” such as separation or divorce. One area that can be hard to talk about with family and friends is the loss of what might have been. These thoughts can bring up triggering emotions and leave one only feeling more activated when experiences and the emotions attached are not recognized as valid. Young adults may be grieving the loss of their childhood and the security that it provided. Adulting is not easy, and it can be difficult to accept the reality of what is. Your current situation in life may be far off from the ideal of what was imagined. Perhaps you are single and grieving a relationship. Maybe you are dissatisfied with your job. Oftentimes, young adults that do achieve either their own or others’ expectations for milestones find that they are lacking fulfillment and questioning the next steps in life. Pulling from various grief and loss models including Bowlby’s-Four-Stages-of-Grief, Kubler-Ross Five-Stages-of-Grief, Worden’s-Four-Tasks-of-Mourning, and Rando’s-Six-processes-of-Mourning, here are some experiences that may resonate with where you are at right now– Preoccupation & Disorganization: You may be fixated on the loss, questioning, and seeking answers. You may be feeling as though your thoughts are all jumbled in your brain. You may be starting to gain an awareness of the situation, but likely not at a place to accept or process it, as it may all be too overwhelming. Acceptance of Reality/ Emotional Experience to Loss: As you begin to accept the reality of what is, you are also having an emotional response. Initially, it may be denial or anger. Perhaps you are experiencing depression. Maybe you feel numb or as if there are no emotions. Whatever response is coming for you, these are all valid. Working Through Pain: Working through pain is painful but the results are worthwhile. Counseling is a great space to help work through the pain as you react to separations and loss or what has occurred, what is anticipated, and what may never be. Working through pain can help prepare one to move through their experience and may have room as they re-adjust and re-invest. Re-Adjust and Re-Invest: When there is loss, there is a readjustment to a new environment such as a new lifestyle, or adjustment to the absence of a person or possession. It is important to re-invest by connecting with others and being able to celebrate what is meaningful. While change and loss are not easy, they are experiences that are woven into our experiences as a human. Being able to recognize the losses of others and come alongside those who are grieving can help facilitate healing. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/different-types-of-grief-and-loss-models/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/different-types-of-grief-and-loss-models Grief and Loss During the Holiday Season
Human life is especially precious. You may have the belief that you need to let go and move on or perhaps stay in a constant state of suffering but what would it be like to sit with the emotions and allow them to co-exist? Could it be possible to create space for happiness and joy amid grief? What would it be like to integrate your experiences and make space for experiences that are painful while giving yourself permission to receive experiences that bring pleasure? This may appear to be paradoxical. How can I experience joy while I am grieving? All-or-nothing-thinking would mean that I am either happy or sad; however, this is also a common cognitive distortion. The life cycle of emotions tends to be fleeing. Did-you-know-that-most-emotions-last-90-seconds? Our emotions encompass experiences that combine physiological arousal; however, feelings are also influenced by our interpretation of how we perceive a situation. The holidays may not ever feel the same now that “______” [fill in the blank of your loved one’s name] is no longer here. It can feel almost surreal to enter an environment in which the deceased is now missing. The void of loss can be profound, and the secondary loss can be especially devastating. Many family dynamics change after the death of central figures who tend to be the “glue” that keeps family gatherings and traditions alive. As you grieve, please also open yourself to the idea of creating-new-tradition-after-a-death. Check out some of these examples to try this holiday season that keeps the memories and holiday traditions alive after the loss of a loved one. Food & music: Cook and serve special food items that were a favorite of a loved one. Perhaps it was an item that they would regularly share with family and friends. Celebrations such as birthdays and holidays are a great time to honor the deceased with festive foods. You can also combine well-loved music or other symbolic items from their culture. Symbolic activities: Lighting a candle, having an extra plate at the dinner table, visiting a gravesite, saying a prayer, or blessing, and having a moment of silence are all examples of symbolic activities. Consider filling in the role within your family if there is a void after the death of a loved one. Perhaps you could stay a new tradition that helps bring others together such as hosting gatherings. Mementos: Create a special gift in honor of the deceased such as a pillow or quilt from the clothing of the deceased or another craft item (the options are endless!) a photo memory gallery, poem, or painting are a few to get you started. Memories: Telling stories, sharing photos, and enjoying memories while connecting and investing in your current relationships, especially those with special significance can help ease the pain with support. Charitable donations: Consider giving back to a cause that is meaningful to you. For example, if you have lost a loved one from cancer, consider volunteering by giving your time or a financial gift (in their name) to help benefit a good cause. A final reminder: Show gratitude for those who are currently in your life. Let a loved one know that you are thinking about them and take the time to express a heartfelt message about what their relationship means to you. Write a letter or send a care package. Consider spending some quality time together. Share your love in a meaningful way. Offer to provide some respite to those who are in a caregiver role. One common source of regret is not spending enough time with loved ones. This holiday season, I encourage you to be available for the people who are important in your world, choose to love one another and celebrate life. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/grief-and-loss-during-the-holiday-season/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/grief-and-loss-during-the-holiday-season The Journey of Grief and Loss
The loss of a loved one may be somewhat predictable such as when an elderly parent or grandparent nears the end of their life. Other times, it may happen quickly and without little warning. For loved ones experiencing chronic or life-threatening medical issues, seeing one in pain is so heartbreaking, especially when you are a caregiver and are a first-had witness to declining health. Parents and caregivers for children, children who are caring for an aging parent, and individuals facing the inevitable loss of a partner or loved one as they approach the end of life may be struggling to take care of themselves as they are caring for others. There are many different types of grief and loss experiences and the responses will vary. In traumatic-grief situations in which the death is violent or accidental one may experience persistent, prolonged-grief. Sudden, unexpected loss such as suicide or death from an accidental medical complication may also precede a traumatic or prolonged grief response. Certain types of death such as grieving-the-death-of-a-child can be especially devastating. In situations where it seems like the laws of the universe have been violated and life was taken too soon, individuals may blame themselves, God, the universe, or a higher power as they are surrounded by grief. Loss of life brings up a variety of emotions such as sadness, sorrow, loneliness, anger, guilt, and longing. Grief-affects-your-body-and-mind. Common physical symptoms can include headache, dry mouth, physical pain, shortness of breath, fatigue, nausea, and appetite changes. Emotions that are causing intense emotional pain or disruptions to daily living such as severe or persistent-depression, significant avoidance or detachment from others, emotional numbness, a sense of meaninglessness, and suicidal thoughts are signs to look out for. In cases where mental health or physical symptoms are life-threatening such as suicide or serious chest pain, call 911. Please take care of yourself and allow yourself to grieve. There is no right or wrong way to grieve a loss. There is no target end date as grief often comes in waves. Time can help heal, as well seeking out support such as supportive family, friends, and spiritual and cultural resources. Our therapists at CARE Counseling have same-week availability to help support you through navigating your journey of grief and loss and would love to get you connected to ongoing support, so you are not walking through a dark time alone. Grief and Loss Resources and Support Groups: https://www.allinahealth.org/health-conditions-and-treatments/grief-resources/support-groups https://www.childrensmn.org/services/family-services/bereavement/bereavement-support-groups/ https://www.essentiahealth.org/services/behavioral-mental-health-services/grief-bereavement-support/ https://brighterdaysgriefcenter.org/ https://www.mayoclinic.org/patient-visitor-guide/support-groups/minnesota https://www.mnhpc.org/grief-support https://survivorresources.org/ https://www.griefloss.org/community-resources.html https://save.org/what-we-do/grief-support/ https://healgrief.org/grieving-the-death-of-a-child/ Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/the-journey-of-grief-and-loss/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/the-journey-of-grief-and-loss Having meaningful relationships through social connection is an important protective factor for good mental health and suicide prevention.
Friends and family are some of our most important sources of social connection. While social media is a quick and easy option, meeting in person whenever possible is recommended. In-person meeting gives the opportunity to better read social cues, pick up on nonverbal communication, and have physical contact. Knowing that a friend or family member is there to listen and support, especially during times of emotional crisis can help save lives. Take time to prioritize these relationships. Mentoring is a great way to connect with a positive role model, which is mutually beneficial to both the mentor and mentee. Check out some of the following mentoring options focused on youth, professional career development, and mental health. Youth Mentors: https://www.bigstwincities.org/ https://www.bolderoptions.org/ https://www.queerspacecollective.org/ Business Mentors: https://twincities.score.org/content/find-mentor-220 https://www.mplsmadwomen.org/about Mental Health Mentors: https://save.org/get-involved/volunteer/ Mentoring is just one example of many ways to get involved in your community, give back in a meaningful way, and to connect with others who have similar values and passion. One way that CARE gives back is through Care More MN by removing barriers for BIPOC students pursuing graduate psychology degrees. There are many different opportunities to get involved. Volunteer Options: https://www.handsontwincities.org/volunteers https://www.volunteermatch.org/ Getting involved with hobbies, especially activities that can be done with others is also a great way to increase life satisfaction while having a good outlet to let go of stress and have some fun. Finally, being available for yourself as part of self-care is way to connect with yourself. Some examples of self-care including taking care of your mind and body by having a healthy foundation of eating, sleeping, and physical exercise. Mindfulness meditation can be a great practice to focus on the present. Evaluating what you want for yourself, setting goals to achieve things that are important, and engaging in activities that bring you joy also lead to increased satisfaction. Being able to be vulnerable and reach out for help is an important reminder. We all need help at times, and seeking help is an act of courage. We CARE about you and your mental health. During times of crisis, call 988 or text SAVE to 741741. We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/meaningful-relationships-through-social-connection-is-an-important-protective-factor-for-good-mental-health-and-suicide-prevention/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/meaningful-relationships-through-social-connection-is-an-important-protective-factor-for-good-mental-health-and-suicide-prevention Holiday SurpriseWe’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/holiday-surprise/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/holiday-surprise CARE CounselingFeatured in St. Cloud State NewsletterThe Clinical Mental Health Counseling (CMHC) Graduate program at SCSU has partnered with CAREMore and their initiative for removing one barrier for BIPOC students, so more mental health professionals can enter the field. Program director, Tina M Sacin reached out to Andrea and John Hutchingson with CARE Counseling to invite them to expand their reach to SCSU’s Clinical Mental Health Counseling Graduate program. After they agreed, Jensi Ocampo Soto was the first SCSU recipient. They honored Jensi at their most recent event at Punchbowl Social on October 12, 2022. Check out St. Cloud State’s full newsletter CHWP Newsletter 22-23 Volume 1 (1) Check out John Hutchingson’s interview regarding books for counselors in training Here. We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/care-counseling-featured-in-st-cloud-state-news/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/care-counseling-featured-in-st-cloud-state-news |
AuthorHello its me Lisa Johnson i am 32 years old from Mission, TX. I am professional family therapist and i also deals in adult therapy and children’s therapy. Archives
April 2023
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