Murder mysteries. Missing persons. Unsolved Cases. There is something that pulls us into these stories–the twists, turns, and plot changes. Finding out the truth can be shocking. No one really knows what goes on behind closed doors—especially when it comes to relationships with emotional abuse and manipulation. If you are involved in a toxic-relationship, it can feel as if you are the only one who knows what is really going on. What is portrayed to others of one’s daily “real-life” experiences are not always what they appear when only observed from the outside. Those following Gabby-Petito’s social media posts of her adventures with Brian-Laundrie see her smiling as thought everything is great. Those who have lived through abusive relationships can relate to the “darker side” when your relationship is an “emotional roller coaster”. Patterns of abuse can start off as slowly, especially in a new relationship. Over time, the abuser uses various tactics to maintain power and control within the relationship and over the other person. Emotional and psychological abuse is just one type of abuse. Tactics might include being possessive/ jealous, keeping tabs on your whereabouts and “monitoring you”, accusing you of cheating, and blaming you for their responses. You may begin to question your own self-worth. You may even question your own reality of accounts when gaslighting is being used. The abuser may further attempt to control by isolating you from loved ones, using threats, and misleading you about your options in relationship. The cycle-of-abuse and power-and-control wheel are two models that can be helpful with understanding dynamics and patterns that are present within abusive relationships; however, abuse does not always follow predictable patterns. In the cycle of abuse, tension builds. You may begin to feel anxious and afraid, as if you are “walking on eggshells” within your relationship, leading up to an “incident”. This may be a physical or verbal altercation in which the abuser using tactics to regain power and control. The third stage is reconciliation, which leads to the calm “honeymoon” stage. The abuser may accuse the victim of provoking them or justify their behavior; the victim may end of taking responsibility through blaming their self. Power and control are central themes in the wheel model; these are viewed as the subtle and continually elements. Using coercion, threats, intimidation, emotional abuse, isolation, economic abuse, children, male privilege and minimizing, denying & blaming are behaviors within the wheel that are reinforced by the outer rings of physical and sexual violence. Gabby Petito’s friends described her relationship as “toxic at times”. Friends say they “always had some drama”…“very low lows and very high highs” but… “always seemed to love each other”. Those who crossed paths with the couple also saw warning signs—those who witnessed “a commotion” and saw a “domestic dispute” may have never imagined how the narrative would unfold. Sadly, Gabby was never able to finish sharing her adventures and unfortunately, subtle “red flags” in an unhealthy relationship can quickly escalate to deadly results. If you or a loved one are currently involved in a toxic relationship, please reach out before it is too late.
DayOne Crisis Hotline 866.223.1111 Minnesota’s statewide hotline for people experiencing violence, 24/7/365 The National Domestic Violence Hotline 800.799.7233 or 800.787.3224 (TTY) Esperanza United 651.772.1611 Bilingual (español) Domestic Violence Helpline National Deaf Domestic Violence Hotline Videophone: 855.812.1001 ThinkSelf – Deaf Advocacy Services Videophone: 651.829.9089 Text Hotline: 621.399.9995 OutFront Minnesota 800.800.0350 LGBTQ+ Anti-Violence Crisis Line LoveIsRespect.org 1.866.331.9474 Teen Dating Violence Hotline StrongHearts Native Helpline 844.762.8483 Native American Domestic Violence Helpline To schedule an appointment with one of our professional counselors, click here. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/gabby-petito/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/gabby-petito
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What is Relapse and What Does it Mean?Relapse is the recurrence and worsening of a condition that has previously improved. For individuals who are in recovery, relapse and even multiple relapses are common. Due to the addictive and chronic nature of drug and alcohol dependence, there is not a quick and easy “cure” but rather an ongoing journey of recovery. When compared to chronic illnesses, substance use disorders have comparable rates of relapse. On average, 40-60% of those with a substance use disorder will relapse. In fact, relapse is often considered a part of the recovery process. A relapse happens when one returns to previous patterns of use, returning to baseline. Relapse often occurs when one stops maintaining goals as part of their recovery plan and are not meeting goals to reduce or stop the use of drugs or alcohol. It is important to differentiate between slip-vs-relapse. A slip is also known as a lapse. It is a single, unplanned use in which one “slips back” into old patterns. While some individuals who experience a slip are immediately able to return to their path of recovery, others may experience relapse or head down the road of negative spiraling. In this case, the consequences can be devastating as it sets back the recovery process and can be endangering to one’s health. Did you know that relapse is considered a process? Just like recovery is considered a process, so is relapse. Stages of relapse can range from weeks to months and include several stages. Emotional relapse. This stage involves one’s behaviors and emotions putting themselves at higher risk of relapse. Triggers such as stress, loneliness, boredom, social isolation, relational conflict, anxiety or depression, and limited social supports are common. Mental relapse. This state involves thinking about using substances. It may include longing to be in the physical places and in the presence of people associated with substance use. Physical relapse. This stage involves using drugs or alcohol. Counseling is an effective treatment intervention for those struggling with emotional and mental relapse since it can help work with the thoughts, behaviors, and emotions that place one at higher risk for relapse. Working with a therapist such as a Licensed Drug and Alcohol Counselor (LADC) can help work towards meeting the goals that are part of a recovery plan. If you or a loved one are currently experiencing a substance use disorder or are in the physical relapse stage, there are local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based supports that can help. SAHMSA’s National Helpline 1-800-662-HELP (4357) can help with referral options as well as publication resources. https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline To schedule an appointment with one of our professional counselors, click here. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/what-is-relapse-and-what-does-it-mean/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/what-is-relapse-and-what-does-it-mean You Are Not a Failure: When Relapse OccursKeeping in mind that relapse is common, it is so important to remain focused on recovery after a relapse. When relapse occurs during the treatment of substance use disorders, it is an indication that additional support is needed. You are not a failure. Talking to your doctor or therapist about starting treatment, resuming treatment, or trying another treatment option are recommended. When relapse occurs, many people experience strong emotions such as feelings of shame and regret. It can be difficult to talk to someone and take the first step for help. You may be tempted to minimize the pervasiveness of an-ongoing struggle in your relationship with drugs or alcohol. Sometimes the feelings of giving in to substance use is greater. You may feel like giving up, especially when you are already feeling like a failure. Imagine yourself in the middle of a body of water, struggling to swim. Your head begins to dip below the surface as you are barely afloat, gasping for air. You feel as though you are drowning. You feel helplessness, fear, and despair. You’ve hit rock bottom as you begin to sink to the bottom. Suddenly, you see someone swimming out in the water with you, offering a flotation device. Do you reach out an accept? In recovery, admission into treatment or admitting you have a problem is a first step. There are supports “swimming” alongside us every day although we may not know who they are until a crisis occurs. Here are some helpful steps that can take while on their journey to recovery before (and after) relapse: • Increase awareness of common risk factor for relapse https://minnesotarecovery.org/telephone-recovery-support/ http://mnalternatives.com/AA%20Alternative%20Support%20Groups.pdf https://aaminnesota.org/meetings/ https://www.naminnesota.org/find-a-meeting/minnesota-meetings/ Recovery is considered a lifelong journey. When relapse occurs, it may be time to alter the course of treatment. This may even involve returning to treatment. SAHMSA’s National Helpline 1-800-662-HELP (4357) can help with referral options Remember that you are not a failure. We are imperfect people in process. Reaching out to accept help is a step of courage and an important part of recovery. To schedule an appointment with one of our professional counselors, click here. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/you-are-not-a-failure-when-relapse-occurs/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/you-are-not-a-failure-when-relapse-occurs How to Talk About Recovery (If YOU Want)There is incredible power in sharing one’s story. There are various characters that are part of story. The settings and plot change. There is a beginning, middle, and end as well as elements of conflict and resolution. Our stories are not over yet and we get to be the narrators. Some stories are easier to share with others. Some stories are told over and over while others may never be shared. When it comes to recovery, it can be hard to know how to talk to friends, family, or co-workers. How do I talk about my story? It takes vulnerability and courage to open up and share an intimate part of one’s self. Brené-Brown explains the difference between vulnerability and oversharing in her book “Daring Greatly”. She writes, “Vulnerability is based on mutuality and requires boundaries and trust. It’s not oversharing, it’s not purging…” Brown adds, “Vulnerability is about sharing our feelings and our experiences with people who have earned the right to hear them”. As a therapist, I feel honored to listen to stories of one’s recovery journey. In relationships, it is important to have a foundation of mutual trust established for emotional safety. It can start by being honest with oneself and others about how your day is really going, being mutually supportive in the daily struggles of life and creating space that feels safe to talk about topics in which there may be a fear of judgement. It can then extend to taking more of a risk sharing information related to a more vulnerable area such as one’s recovery or struggles with mental illness. Family, friends, and co-workers may not understand or respond by giving unwanted advice. Setting a boundary and sharing educational resources may be helpful to help educate others. Ideally, family, friends, and co-workers are taking active steps to be educated around substance use disorders. National Recovery-Month is a great time to raise awareness and get talking (if you want). Accessing people and spaces that feel safe and supportive such as a sponsor, loved one who is also in recovery, or support group is a great place to start. There may be opportunities to share with family as part of recovery programs such as with making amends or utilizing family supports. Working with a professional can help facilitate communication and set boundaries around what is communicated. Timing is important. One does not need to share their entire story, nor all the details. You get to choose if and what you share about your recovery journey with others. If you are not yet connected to recovery peer support, here are some options to check out: https://minnesotarecovery.org/telephone-recovery-support/ http://mnalternatives.com/AA%20Alternative%20Support%20Groups.pdf https://aaminnesota.org/meetings/ https://www.naminnesota.org/find-a-meeting/minnesota-meetings/ https://namimn.org/support/nami-minnesota-support-groups/ To schedule an appointment with one of our professional counselors, click here. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/how-to-talk-about-recovery-if-you-want/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/how-to-talk-about-recovery-if-you-want How to Be PresentIn a world full of distraction, being fully present is not always easy. Our mind can become stuck in the past. I should of…I could have…Perhaps your mind goes back to a particularly difficult experience and the painful emotions that are associated with that time in your life. Our mind can also race ahead to the future. I need to… What if?… Worries about making the best or “right” decisions to plan and prepare for [and hopefully control] any possible variables that might disrupt the plan. Bringing you back to the present moment, we cannot go back in time to change events that have already happened or predict the future 100% of the time but we can shift our perspective to become more present in the present-moment. Two major components of being present involve awareness and mindfulness. To become more present, one learns to develop a conscious awareness of the present moment. Rather than turning to escape or avoidance, one is tuning into their body, noticing the sensations, thoughts, and emotions. We are taking a non-judgmental stance, accepting our experiences for what they are and extending this to others. There is beauty in the humanity that we share during being fully present, especially during times of suffering when extending loving kindness to ourselves and others. Being present is not a one-time event, but rather an intentional state of being. If can help one feel grounded in the moment, which is so important to help provide an anchor for support. Here are FIVE Ways to Be More Present: 1) Reduce distractions. Creating space to pause or take a break for yourself can help you be fully present. For many people, the time that is set aside for a weekly therapy session is built into routine as intentional, focused time to be present. Practical steps such as turning off the TV or putting down your phone when talking to loved ones shows they are important. Don’t be afraid to create space for silence. 2) Listen. Listen to understand and truly empathize with yourself and others. 3) Tune into your body and senses. Take a moment to listen to what your body is telling you. Tuning into your body can help you learn to relax and soothe your body through activities such as breathing, meditation, and mindful movement. 4) Incorporate mindfulness into routine. Try incorporating mindfulness into your daily routines such mindful movement, mindful yoga, even mindful eating and connection. 5) Re-conceptualize change. You may view change as processing the past or future planning. While these both have important roles, changing is happening in the present “here and now”. The past and present can be utilized within journaling and visualization. Practicing gratitude is a great way to reflect in the present as you are implementing change “one day at a time.” To schedule an appointment with one of our professional counselors, click here. Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/how-to-be-present/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/how-to-be-present 2021 National Recovery Month ObservanceRecovery is for everyone because it benefits everyone. In recovery, we build new connections to ourselves, our families, and our communities. The 2021 National Recovery Month theme, “Recovery is for Everyone: Every Person, Every Family, Every Community” reminds people in recovery and those who support them, that recovery belongs to all of us. We are all called to end gatekeeping and welcome everyone to recovery by lowering barriers to recovery support, creating inclusive spaces and programs, and broadening our understanding of what recovery means for people with different experiences. While it may be tempting to characterize recovery as a universal experience or single journey, our community is proof that there are as many pathways to and of recovery as there are people. Our strength is our diversity and because of who we are, the recovery community has unique opportunities to learn, challenge, grow, and dream. By expanding traditional, limited conceptions of recovery, which center white, heterosexual, cisgender, religious, wealthy perspectives, we enrich everyone’s experience. Mental health and substance use disorder are not one-size-fit all conditions, nor do they affect everyone equally. Culturally competent multilingual resources and gender-expansive programs acknowledge and include LGBTQ+ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning), BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and people of color), and other historically marginalized community members. Looking beyond our individual experiences strengthens and supports recovery in all its forms. The recovery community has a powerful foundation of mutual aid, peer support, and adaptability. As we grow in empathy and understanding, we save lives by adding protective factors and building resiliency. We honor the incredible contributions from communities within recovery as groups connect and implement resources that serve their unique needs. The powerful bonds built in recovery are life-altering. To honor those bonds, in every form they take, is a significant factor in sustaining recovery as well as building bridges between our communities. When we connect with open minds and hearts, we learn from one another and create life-saving opportunities. To heal ourselves, our communities must also heal. Recovery Research Institute conducted a nuanced, five-year study that explored the ways in which substance use disorder impacted families, communities, and cultures, and how recovery in those spaces created opportunities to rebuild. The study affirmed that people in distressed communities need opportunities to share their experiences, therefore, personal recovery can translate into collaborative recovery when the individual begins to see their story as part of a larger story. The shift from “I” to “we” is transformative. We call to nurture this “we.” We find new ways of connecting the recovery community. We call to rejuvenate struggling communities and families. At the same time, we work to empower communities who grapple with inequitable conditions, including the effects of systemic racism, homophobia, transphobia, generational poverty, adverse childhood experiences, and other forces. Social connections, family support, and neighborhood relationships are directly linked to wellness and recovery. We must ensure that everyone has the same chance at recovery. Our “I” must become our “we.” National Recovery Month educates others about recovery from mental health, substance use, and co-occurring disorders, the effectiveness of treatment and recovery support services, and that recovery is possible. All of us, from celebrities and sports figures to our co-workers, neighbors, friends, and family members, throughout our lives have experienced peaks and valleys, both big and small. And, with strength, support and hope from the people we love, we are resilient. By asserting that “Recovery is for Everyone,” we reduce the stigma surrounding people with substance use or mental health disorders, especially when complicated by oppressive forces like white supremacy, systemic racism, punitive criminal justice systems, and policy that excludes less privileged people. Recovery is always person-first. “Meeting people where they are at” translates into acknowledging their unique experiences and needs, including people of different cultures, identities, backgrounds, and communities. OBJECTIVES The National Recovery Month observance serves as a reminder that when we empower communities and families, we are engaging in healing that extends beyond the individual. “Recovery is for Everyone” means we are proud of our diversity, and we are committed to sharing our personal accomplishments and struggles, reaching across barriers to support one another, and actively dismantling systems that harm our recovery neighbors. The 2021 National Recovery Month observance and theme, “Recovery is for Everyone” works to inspire people across the country to transform the “I” into “we” and build bridges between families, communities, and groups. We celebrate our diversity and seek to develop deeper understanding, caring, and connection that nurtures recovery. Courtesy of SAMHSA Written By: Charlotte Johnson, MA, LPCC We’re Here to helpOur wellness experts will be happy to take care of you. You can CLICK HERE to schedule an appointment now or call (612)223-8898. Meet CliniciansWe’re united by our commitment to providing effective, relevant, and innovative mental health support at all stages of your journey. Click Here to find out more about who we are, where we come from, and how we live out CARE’s mission every day. The professionals at CARE are actively collecting and creating resources to help with what you need. We’re Here for You. from https://care-clinics.com/2021-national-recovery-month-observance/ from https://careclinics.weebly.com/blog/2021-national-recovery-month-observance |
AuthorHello its me Lisa Johnson i am 32 years old from Mission, TX. I am professional family therapist and i also deals in adult therapy and children’s therapy. Archives
April 2023
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